Kurenai's Good Bye
by Alaeruim
Summary: MAJOR SPOILER! Shikamaru has to break the terrible news to Kurenai, but she has a secret to make it all that much worse. R


**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or any of its characters, blah, blah, blah.**

**Kurenai's Good Bye**

I glance at my reflection in the mirror.

Arms tightly wrapped around my midsection, hand covering my mouth. My ebony hair is a tousled, messy heap, my crimson eyes bloodshot and my skin seems unusually pale for its tone.

I can see myself shaking uncontrolably, and I feel very clammy. My disheveled appearance is startling.

And all I can think of is, "Oh my god!"

I glance down at the sink's marble surface. My gaze trains on a single item. A tiny white square of an electric device. A short message glares up at me from its screen, taunting me. The soul source of my surprise.

Yes, a pregnancy test.

"How could this happen?" I think over and over again, "We've been so careful."

Of course I'm excited, really, I am. But think about it, I'm a ninja, I'm a Jounin. I, we, can't handle a baby right now. We both have missions to do, we both have students to teach!

Who is the father, you may ask? Sarutobi Asuma, of course.

We've been dating for almost a year now, _this_ started happening almost two months ago, he moved in shortly after.

Where is Asuma?

He and team 8 are on a mission, they have been for the last two days.

For the past few days, I've been very ill, now I know why, and Asuma's been worried. Knowing him, he's still worrying himself sick.

At first, I thought I was just catching a virus that was running around, so I just brushed it aside. This possibility was always on my mind. I didn't want to believe it, but as the days drew on, I began to wonder.

So, here I am, and I still have my doubts.

"Maybe I need to check with Tsunade-sama."

I'm just about to step outside, when I hear loud banging on the door. Sensing three familiar chakras, I smile to myself.

"That'd be my students."

I forgot, today I promised to give them special training.

I smile, "You don't need to bang, Kiba, I can hear you."

I open the door, meeting the lovely faces of Kiba, Hinata and Shino.

Kiba scratches the back of his head in embarassment, "Oh, sorry about that, sensei."

"Kurenai-sensei," Hinata looks up at me, I can see the concern in her eyes, "are you not feeling well today?"

"Is it that obvious?"

I flash her a tiny smile, "I'm fine, thank you, Hinata. Before we get started, I need to see the Hokage. You guys go on ahead, I'll meet you there."

"No way!" Kiba says, pumping his fists in the air, "We wanna go, too, you know, make sure you're okay and all."

"Thank you, Kiba."

I nervously stare at Tsunade as she looks over the test results.

"So," I question quietly, "how does it look?"

She drops the envelope that contains the papers and slowly stepping around her desk.

"You'll need to stop training immediately." she says quietly, leaning on the desk's top.

"So its true."

I glance at Tsunade more thoroughly, she doesn't look herself. She looks deep in thought, as if she has something very important to say, but wishes not to. As if something is harming her from the inside.

"Hokage-sama?" I question quietly, glancing up at her in concern.

Yes, she's the Hokage, the most powerful ninja, but she's human. She, too, is able of sickness and emotions like the rest of us.

She turns her head, as if to avoid my gaze, "If you'd like, I'll find a temporary replacement for your students."

I smile kindly, "No, that won't be necissary. When he gets back, I'll have Asuma take over."

For a split second, I think I see her cringe, hurt and fear cover her face. Maybe my eyes are playing tricks on me.

She crosses her arms, "Team 10 has returned."

I feel my heart leap, my stomach bounce with butterflies and I feel a huge grin coming on.

"I'll leave you now, I need to speak with Asuma."

"Kurenai," she says quietly, stopping me instantly, "I need to tell you-"

"Tsunade baa-san!"

Both of our heads snap to the direction of the door. Standing in the doorway are Naruto and Shikamaru.

They look like they have been running. They're both covered in dirt and sweat, and they're both breathing heavily.

"Excuse us, Hokage-sama," Shikamaru says after catching his breath, bowing respectfully, "I need to talk with Kurenai."

Tsunade gets this understanding, grateful look on her face and dismisses us.

Shikamaru and I are walking silently through the quietest part of the village. The air is thick and tense, why?

Naruto disappeared shortly after we left. Said something about needing to find the "Ero-sennin".

I stip suddenly, Shikamaru stops a couple of steps ahead of me. He slowly looks back, "Kurenai?" he says after a moment.

"Enough!" I say quietly, "Tell me you need to say so that I can get home to Asuma."

He cringes and lowers his gaze to the dirt road beneath his feet.

After another few minutes, he whispers, "That's just it. Asuma-sensei...he...he won't be coming back."

My eyes widen, and my body suddenly seems heavy. My vision blurs as I give in to the ground.

My hand clasps over my mouth as I slowly shake my head, "No..." I whisper, almost inaudible to my own ears, "...h-he can't...!"

Shikamaru is down on his knees, arms wrapped around my shoulders, I feel his hot tears on my shoulder.

"I'm so sorry, Kurenai...w-we just couldn't save him."

I bury my face in his comforting shoulder, my tears quickly soak his thick green vest.

"No, this can't happen! He's supposed to be here...with me...and the baby..."

After what seems like forever of leaning on each other, we finally pull away.

He reaches in to his pocket and pulls out a handkercheif, "Here." he says, passing it to me.

As I wipe at my soaked face, he whispers, "Asuma-sensei told me to tell you something."

"What?"

"...He said that he loves you...with all of his heart. He wants you to be happy, and not to mourn him too much." he gets this confused look on his face, "And, he said something about not wanting you to lose this child."

I freeze in surprise, "H-he knew?"

"Hmph." he says, a tiny smirk returns to his face, "So you are, then. He said something about the angels telling him."

I feel tears prick at my eyes, "...Asuma."

I clear my throat, "When's the funeral?"

"Tomorrow evening." he replies, helping me to my feet, "I'm going to miss him."

"You have no idea."

I glance up and down the numerous rows of black clad ninja. Everyone is here.

I wipe my tear-stained face on my drenched sleeve. I feel a hand gently rub my back, and Tsunade's kind words in my ears.

I brush a rain-soaked strand of hair behind my ear and slowly advance toward the flower covered memorial.

I kneel, setting my flower in front of his picture.

I force a tiny smile.

"He looks so happy."

I lightly brush the frame, feeling the tears come back.

I place my other hand on my abdomen, and whisper, "I'm trying to be strong, Asuma. For you and for our child. But its hard."

The tears slowly cascade down my raw pink face as Gai gently pulls me to my feet.

"I'll try...I promise."

**Sorry about the ending, I was severely distracted (glares at Kassie).  
I hope you enjoyed it though, R & R.**

**For my other story "Kakashi's Little Lily", I've gotten requests to make a sequel. I've decided that I might try it, but I need names for the Naruto character's kids. So please contribute.**

**Thanks  
- Kaz**


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